There is a button at the top that says "report abuse".

Should I be concerned?

Today, I decided to write a poem....

And then I tried to write it, and it ended up very badly.

This is why I could never be a poet. Even though, my hero is Dr Seuss.
I LOVE YOU CAT IN THE HAT!

Though, I do have a point today.

Last night, I had time travelled back to year 9... I mean, I was in a group conversation on MSN and someone mentioned my dislike of having my name used mid-conversation and it's mainly due to the context and I time travel back to year 9 when I was getting in trouble. Which, I believe happened a lot in year 9. It's so hard to recall some days.

Any way, as I tried to defend myself I mention that it is due to the authoritive voice thing and that is the context that I object to.

Then I mentioned, do you know who has a terrifying authoritive voice? Mary.
And they are all "No, no way! I don't believe it" even when I carried on with the fact that she left me a voicemail and I swear I was getting denention.

But no!
These people do not believe that Mary is evil! Let alone as some kind of authoritive voice.
I mean, I have an entire blog dedicated to damn her, well, ok, Mar(t)y McFly is also around somewhere.... She mainly reads from the background... Hi Mar(t)y McFly!

Now, would this happen to some who is all "sweet and innocent" and a third word that I forget but implies the same kind of thing? Really!
No! This is about damnation!

This is like that arc in Angel where everyone is all "woo! Jasmine!" including this except you know She's evil!
Well, I don't know if she's evil... It's kind of ambigeous... It's interesting.
But basically, there is killing people.
And the only person that knows is Fred and she goes around and try and convinces people.
Apparently, I'm all Fred now about this.
Crazy and paranoid.

Oh well...
Maybe I can use this to benefit me...

Then again, if I end up not posting ever again, I don't want to say look in Mary's direction...
but I have photographic evidence of her trying to kill me in my own bucket..

Staged you say?

Well, Damn you! AND THE MARY YOU CAME IN ON!


Just another pancake on the pile, ain't that right McFly, ain't that right?

So, 'til next time, keep on damnin'
Damn you Mary, Damn you.

Elyse


Just to say, "Damn you and the Mary you came in on" may be the greatest line I have ever written.
I don't think that bodes well for my skillz as a writer.

To Mary,

Your face.

May it be damned, along with the rest of you.

All my love,
Elyse

It's been a while

Oh wow... It's been a while since Mary got damned.

Though, in an important turn of events.
Mary got some revenge on me.

Photos to come!

So, to Mary, for trying to drown me in my own fake fountain, this I damn you for.

Damn you Mary, Damn you.

And scene.

In the spirit of all things being equal, let us now damn Mary in an overly dramatic way.

Now, first allow me to emotionally prepare for this. *deep breath*.



DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! YOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Mary.

And scene.

Deconstructing comments!

This might just become a regular segment here at Damn You Mary, Damn You... Deconstructing the comments that we get.

Today's comment comes from our very own Mar(t)y McFly. Hi McFly!

So, let's look at Mar(t)y's comment. Just as a side note, Mar(t)y is actually quite hard to type and for some reason counts as a word to my spell check and yet McFly doesn't. How odd...

Onwards we move!
To the block quote!

Sorry, I didn't mean too...
At least i gave it back to you, right?

Now, first allow me to destroy... I mean question... no comment, Maybe I should stick with destroy. Allow me to crush my lovely assistant.
Oh man, I'm totally going to get ran over with a car for this.

I hope all our viewers are sitting down right now as I reveal the biggest secret I have. My assistant, our very own Mar(t)y McFly is actually the one and same Mary of Damn You Mary, Damn You fame.
Yes, I know.
It's shocking, right?

I thought now one would ever work out our ingenious code, alas, I was wrong.

The alter ego thing is ruined. I wonder if this is how Clark Kent felt...

Oh well, let's look at the comment in seperate parts!

Sorry

Yeah you are.

I didn't mean too...

That's what they all say, this time my V, next time my kidney.
"hey Elyse, we did give you a lot of alcohol so you'd pass out. We were kind!"

I guess one of them was technically yours...

At least i gave it

Yes, you generosity is infamous! INFAMOUS!
Alternatively... Yeah, you did.

back to you

Was a terrible show. I just don't really get it.
There is also some terrible puns I'm thinking of, so I'll keep you distracted with some other terrible puns.
So I went camping on the weekend, it was in-tents.

, right?

Left.


I'm not sure who wins this round Mary, but your lack of commitment to your alter ego is disheartening.
Or maybe I should be asleep and not on the internet.
Damn replies! Damn you Mary! DAMN YOU!

I think next time I should write a reply on one of McFly's posts... That was a hint, Mar(t)y. Subtle, huh?
And then deconstruct my own comment.

Could be fun.

Do you know what could also be fun?
Damning Mary.

'til next time.

Elyse

And Scene.

So, I was hangin' out with our namesake here at "Damn You Mary, Damn You", hey Mary.. What's up?

And well, do you know what ended up happening?
She left with my two bottles of V... Who does that?
And I'm choosing to ignore that she took my glasses and sunglasses.. but only because I had a spare pair of sunglasses in my bag.
Which is just odd in itself, but that's not the point.

She took my V!
Seriously man, that's not cool.

That's the type of thing that leads to damnation.

I mean I could have needed that to be able to have enough caffiene that I'll eventually be able to slow time! TO SLOW TIME!
And why does Mary take it?
Because she likes the colour green dammit!

I may have made that last part up, but still...
She is a theif! A THEIF! The stealer of both truth and my possestions.. .

I just realised I didn't call her a liar because that's not cool, but the line "stealer of both truth and possessions" is fucking gold! Well, not actually fucking gold, because that would be difficult.

It's because of things like this we have this forum, to spread all our Mary bitching needs.

Now, Mary, if you ever read this, just remember, if you want to steal my V all you have to do is challenge me to a fight to the death. You know I'll say yes.

Following on from that statement, if Mary does read this and I then mysteriously go missing.. Just putting it out there... Just putting it out there.

And on that note...

RUN!